- working hard. cosmo magazine-like discussions with eugene and priscilla between sighs of frustration, questions about STATA programming, and sharing excel tricks: the term "hooking up," is it inclusive or exclusive of intercourse? does buying condoms jinx you? what are the implications of bad kissing?
- related. my mom offered one nugget of wisdom when i was fifteen and most of my friends turned from girls to boys -- boys, they only want one thing, and it's not friendship. i didn't believe her at the time, but slowly, i think i'm starting to agree.
- commuting. sometimes the clouds west of 280 look like they're caught between the hills. i like that :)
- friendship and favors. general disillusionment with people: it insults me when friends presume they have to guilt me into performing favors instead of just asking. if you're my friend, i'll probably do everything i can to help you out. i carry so much guilt already, adding more is just mean. it makes me wonder if all of our relationships are just exchanges of favors, and i'm stupid for thinking that it's anything more. it also makes me feel defensive.
- natural menstrual products. the "lunapad" and "divacup," kind of like cloth diapers. seems like a lot of work, but maybe cheaper and better for the environment? what do you think?
- awkward. i've come to think of social interaction as intrinsically awkward, and that's okay. it doesn't seem to be okay with anyone else. maybe i'm an alien!
- defeated. trying not to feel that way. writing holiday cards as a disciplining exercise.
- rewind. rethinking 2007 and comparing to years past. not a good year, probably one of the worst, but then, my worst is better than a lot of people's best; i have good friends, a supportive family, and a job where personal development is considered important, and a nice place to live. 2001 and 2004 stand out as bad years as well. is this a three year cycle? previous bad years were defined by break-up, complicating friendship issues, moving/running away, moving on to a new school and job.
- union meeting. we aired our greivances at work today. we're such brats.
- silly. my dad used "lol" in an email. my mom told me i'm unfashionable, that i look like i'm from the 1990s.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
floating around in my brain
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1 comments:
I've always thought buying a box of condoms jinxes you. The last time I did, I did it because I was tired of stealing condoms from my roommates. I thought, I'm grown up, I can buy a box. And then things fell apart.
I am unsure about kissing. Part of me thinks that it says something about how good the sex will be. Like, a sloppy kisser will be an awkward lover; an aggressive kisser will be inattentive as a lover. but actually, i think it is that the more a person seems to put into kissing - trying to make the kiss unique, etc - the better they will be at oral sex. and that more attentive a person is in making out, the more attentive they will be during intercourse. but i don't know that this is all empirically true.
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